CHANN-isms: Women, Career & Life

I LOVE LOVE MY MALE FRIENDS... Word of advice to women, stop talking to one another and talk to MEN for the REAL TRUTH. I grow so much from conversations with my male friends. Thank you Chann getting a lot of powerful nuggets from our conversation tonight.

CHANN-ISMS ON WOMEN: 

• Right now I’m on a diet with women. Some dudes feel like they gotta be eating all the time. Always eating “fast” food – everyday at McDonald’s. Sometimes I want Ruth Chris, some steak and potatoes. 

• Toughest woman to get with is an established woman – those are good catches. That’s the woman you gotta work for. She’s the woman that will make you want to clean your place before she comes over. It’s been a long time since I had a woman that makes me wanna “clean up”. That’s (Ruth Chris) steak and potatoes. With a woman like that you gotta be persistent. Don’t buckle. You get a woman like that with time. With an accomplished woman you gotta be that guy that’s been there – over time. A good woman is not gonna talk to just anybody. She is hard on me so I know she will be hard on another man trying to pull her. When I meet HER we are gonna clash first. She is gonna give me a hard time. Not to be “cute” its just that she’s been around. She has EARNED her place in life and is gonna make me work to get her.

• Some women distort their own selection to the point of confusion wanting to be desired by a bunch of men.
• Too many women are “hungry”. I can’t stand a hungry woman – when you don’t even have to work for it.

• It’s not an emergency. They got us thinking we gotta be married and sometimes the worst problems are the ones you walk through your own front door. 

• A lot of women LOOK like they ACT.

• Some women go to work looking like they are going to the club and go to the club looking like they are going to work and wonder why men don’t see them.

• The problem is not women acting like they know what they deserve - it’s that they think you OWE them something.

• Too many women are walking issues. 

• I invest in realness.

• The smartest man you can be with is a man that sees his “ways” and is working hard to change them. 

• You’ll know he loves you when he is- there. He will be around. He will be by your side. 

CHANN-ISMS ON JOBS:

• I wanna be the BEST but sometimes I think being the best might make me someone I don’t wanna be. It’s not a sacrifice I’m willing to make.

• If I’m working somewhere and there is no one around I wanna be like – ITS TIME TO GET OUT.

CHANN

more... CHANN-isms:

• To really be successful you gotta be comfortable with being uncomfortable.

• Knowledge is supposed to be power. But it’s not. Today power is what you have.

• We are living in the land of power struggles. It’s What I Got vs. What You Got.

• Real talk: Evelyn has an EGO – you saw how she was acting on that show – and Chad got EGO too. They probably literally bumped heads. 

• Champions begin to lose when they realize they don’t have to fight anymore. Case in point: Mike Tyson. Mike Tyson was angry that was his motivation. When he lost his anger he started to lose.

Raw Reality: "Close Your Legs"

A CALL TO ACTION

from Relationship Coach Tony Gaskins

"Classy & Intelligent Women Unite: CLOSE YOUR LEGS".

"If you want something you never had. 

You have to be willing to do something you've never done."

What He Said After 13 Years of Marriage...

I had the most insightful impromtu conversation with a colleague yesterday.  The conversation came out of nowhere and almost 24 hours later STILL has me thinking.  I regard him highly because I think he may be the smartest yet most unassuming man in any room he walks into.  I'm attempting to paraphrase what he said after 13 years of marriage....

75% of the people with paperwork at the courthouse are not married.  Married in the purest sense of the word/concept. Marriage when done properly is the meeting of two people on all levels mentally, physically and spiritually.  There are many people who meet and are okay with their partner's intelligence, like the way they look and cool with their status and how much money they make.  Thus my argument, the majority of the people getting married are not fully vested in their relationships.

Take a man, he's got his girlfriend he's been with her a while, her body is a 10, she is okay in the bedroom and smart enough.  He's only getting partially filled with her. Which leaves him open when he meets someone else with qualities that his woman lacks... this woman has an okay body but incredible in the bedroom and more intellectual and makes more money.  He gets partially filled from her. That"s how a lot of men exist in their relationship - partially filled.  But, marriage takes a full investment of your entire self.  A REAL marriage is a rare and unique experience that is not easily acquired - two people fully committed and invested in each other and getting 100% filled by their spouse.  Not commitment in the sense of "I'm not having sex with anyone else" but fully committed to their faults, their likes, their ups, their downs and the person they will evolve into in 15 years.

Women are more complex than men.  The idea that a woman can grow another human being inside her - Wow!  Its truly amazing how a woman can juggle so much and multi-task all the elements of life, wife and motherhood. We men a are very very simple, we want only three things.... Food. Sex. Money.  When those things are in order we ultimately are happy.  (So I guess he agrees with Steve Harvey) 

For me I look for three things in my woman in particular - just being honest -  1) body/beauty 2) status/money 3) intelligence.  Those three things in a woman do it for me.  And I think its extremely sexy to see a single woman in church  - it says she is searching for the higher meaning/purpose in life.

I am not on Facebook for one reason - I am focused on my goals and objectives. I don't want the distractions of other's people's lives in my life right now.  I have to tune out all other influences and distractions until I have achieved my station/positon in life.   I have no need to post photos of my kids and reconnect with college buddies until I'm where I want to be.

Forget about race. power. respect. Money is the ultimate equalizer - that's what it is all about. If you've got money you can acquire whatever - WHATEVER - you want in life. (Health and peace of mind obviously not included on his list - money surely can't buy that. As a matter of fact, often pursuit of money destroys both health and peace of mind.)